I caved. Found a great deal in my size on Ebay. Then it went on supersale on the katespade.com website so I would have caved anyway. What's more American than being excessive and indulgent? Sort of kidding... I'm not the best at being a patriot when hard-pressed. But I did feel a lot of national pride when I stumbled into a restaurant that stocks the Coppola Winery Sofia (which is blanc de blanc in a pink can with the most technologically advanced straw I've ever used).
Ever since I heard that this absolutely ridiculous product existed, I've wanted to check it out. It was decent. I wouldn't spend restaurant mark-up prices for it ever again, but if it was on special at the liquor store, I might bite again because of the novelty.
Hope you have a Happy Fourth!